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LOVE: Connect to Your Supporting Cast

COMMUNICATION: “If you want to be understood – listen.”

Movie quote from: Babel (2006) – Movie tagline

I watched Babel without subtitles, so it was tough to find a meaningful quote.  I suspect there were some thought-provoking lines in the film, but they were spoken in Arabic, Spanish, or Japanese, languages I don’t understand.  However, this is the point of the film.  We can understand each other, if we will only take the time. 

GRACE: “In this world, you must be oh-so-smart or oh-so-pleasant. For years I was smart. I recommend pleasant.”

Movie quote from: Harvey (1950) – Elwood P. Dowd (James Stewart) 

harveyElwood P. Dowd is a kind soul, gracious in every way to every person he meets.  In a world of people chasing social status, professional recognition, and/or financial gain, Elwood (James Stewart) is the only one unruffled by the trappings of image and personal gain.  But Elwood P. Dowd isn’t perfect. His constant companion is a six-foot invisible rabbit.  The 1950 film Harvey won the hearts of moviegoers and provides a compelling example of the great wisdom of living a considerate life. 

MARRIAGE: “We both said, ‘I do!’ and we haven’t agreed on a single thing since.”

Movie quote from: So I Married an Axe Murderer (1993) - Stuart Mackenzie (Mike Myers)

axeWhat is it about marriage that causes ‘deeply passionate relationships’ to slide into ‘taking each other for granted on a daily basis’?  Why does a sense of permanence make it less likely a couple will stay together?  Although the craggy old Scottish father in So I Married an Axe Murderer is joking when he says the quote above, this is the reality for many a modern marriage.  Fortunately, a bland marriage can be rejuvenated by adopting a novel perspective for what a lifelong relationship really can be.

SUPPORT: “Sometimes you really can’t listen to what anybody else says. You just got to listen inside.”

Movie quote from: October Sky (1999) - Miss Riley (Laura Dern)

octoberIn the moving 1999 film, October Sky, Homer Hickham wants to build rockets.  His Dad wants him to work in the coal mine.  The pressures of life are not in Homer’s favor as he pursues his growing love of model rocketry.  It takes a teacher to encourage him to dream bigger than his own community would allow.  This is the great power of a supportive mentor in a person’s life. 

OPENNESS: “I’m not sure ‘being in the same place’ and ‘being friends’ is the same thing.”

Movie quote from: Charlotte's Web (2006) - Wilber (Dominic Scott Kay)

charlotteIn Charlotte's Web, Wilber the pig is moved to a new barnyard.  Immediately upon arrival, he introduces himself to the various animal groups.  Everyone seems uninterested in playing with Wilber, comfortable within their own fences and daily routines.  This is the same experience faced by any person moving to a new environment.  It's never easy to be the new pig in town.

FRIENDSHIP: “Everything in balance, Woodrow. You do more work than you got to, so it's my obligation to do less."

Movie quote from: Lonesome Dove (1989) – Gus McCrae (Robert Duvall)

DoveYou cannot replace old friends.  They know what you’re thinking often before you do.  They make room for your unique perspectives.  They step forward when the world steps away.  Such great relationships develop over time in the cauldron of shared life experiences.  No film captures the essence of old friendships as well as Lonesome Dove, a made-for-TV movie from 1989.  Throughout the film, two old Texas Rangers demonstrate the three essential characteristics that define a great friendship.

PARENTING: “What His Majesty is denied, he goes half-mad to obtain. What he gets freely, he despises.”

Movie quote from: Anne of the Thousand Days (1969) – Thomas Boleyn (Michael Hordern)

AnneIf you want to see what happens when you give a child anything he/she wants, watch King Henry VIII’s behavior in the film, Anne of the Thousand Days.  His character, as played by Richard Burton, is an arrogant boor whose lust for Anne Boleyn is fueled by her disinterest in him.  Not capable of adapting himself, Henry sets about changing the world to get what he wants.  We don’t do a child or a king any favors when we cater to their every need.  Henry VIII would not survive in a world with as much change and diversity as ours.  Neither will a spoiled child.

HUMAN INTERACTION: "Did you know that cigarettes are a shield against meaningful interaction with people?"

Movie quote from: 200 Cigarettes (1999) - Kevin (Paul Rudd)Smoke

Never say that things don't change.  Even the Germans have decided to recognize the problems of second-hand smoke.  Cigarettes will still be allowed in the pubs and bars but politicians have conceded that perhaps smoking in schools and public sites is not good for the health of the nation.

FEELINGS: "Worrying is like a rocking chair. It gives you something to do but it doesn't get you anywhere."

Movie quote from: Van Wilder (2002) - Van Wilder (Ryan Reynolds)

Rocking Chair
Worry is fantasy done poorly.  It serves no value to anticipate things that may never happen.  Yet worry remains one of the biggest energy-suckers today.  Lucky for me, I learned a perspective that always helps to tuck all present-day worries away.

HUMANITY:"The time to make up your mind about people is never."

Reel Life Wisdom Quote from: The Philadelphia Story (1940) - Tracy Lord (Katherine Hepburn)

acceptancePeople are dynamic beings. We change and adapt over time. For some, this change is unfortunate.  Personality and spirit can decay during a streak of disquieting events and/or negative influences. For others, the change over time is great. Years of positive people and free-spiritedness can puts a real snap back into a person's step.  Whatever another person experiences, we must accept that they will change over time. 

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